I asked my cousin about her kids to get a response to what has been said in situations such as words we don't say. My cousin told me that her son saw this lady and said, "she is ugly." Sophia said she responded by saying, "boy, hush! you're not suppose to say that."
I think the message that she communicated to her son was that it is wrong and impolite to say someone is ugly. As an anti-bias educator I would have responded by saying that we are beautiful in our own way. Beauty is only skin deep, it is the inner beauty that means the most.
"No one escapes learning stereotypes and misconceptions about various aspect of human diveristy. These lessons begin when we are very young, taught initially and most powerfully by our family and then by the larger world around us" (Derman-Sparks & Edwards, 2010, p. 23).
Reference
Derman-Sparks, L. & Edwards, J. O. (2010). Anti-Bias Education for Young Children and Ourselves.
Washington, DC: NAEYC
Allison,
ReplyDeleteI have grown to understand that children say exactly what they feel. They speak their minds without thinking of the consequences and effects that it could have on a person. I had a similar incident happen to me when I was out with my nephew. I was so embarrassed and I explained to him that we all look different from one another. I let him know that despite of our differences we are valued assets in today's society and can bring forth some many ideas. He seemed to understand what I was saying and apologized for his actions. It scares me as I will have to explain this to my own child so that she do not go around making judgment or saying mean things to others. Great post!
I like your proposed response! I think that, so often, we hear children utter comments that are considered to be rude or inappropriate and are dumbstruck when it comes to providing an appropriate response. Whether it is from embarassment or shock, we often say nothing.
ReplyDeleteAllison,
ReplyDeleteI love the example you used. I often find that having children put themselves in others shoes can be very helpful. I would also have told the child we are all beautiful in our own way, but I feel that I would have added another piece. Maybe, asking the child how he thought the woman would feel is she heard him say she was ugly. Or how he would feel if someone said something similar to him. Great post and you must be a wonderful role model in his life!
Raina